Street Fighter 4 video game image Dhalsim

Last night writer and host of “This Week In Blackness” Elon James White (@elonjames) started a tongue and swollen cheek discussion about the sex lives of “Street Fighter” video game characters that went so far off the rails that Amtrak is applying for government aid to clean up the aftermath.

RELATED: Don Lemon’s Haircut Breaks Twitter

It all started off innocently enough. One of our favorite writers and Twitter personalities @BrokeyMcPoverty inquired about the most amazing thing anyone has ever done while drunk. Elon recalled beating the brakes off some poor chap in “Street Fighter II” while knocking back some Whiskey.

RELATED: Pugilistic Linguistics: 25 Street Fighter Lyrics For The 25th Anniversary

That turned into a drunken Street Fighter/Bourbon tournament challenge (that should TOTALLY happen, btw) and then all hell broke loose into a sexually explicit group think.

Twitter avatars were getting punched in the face with vaginas and one of the best hentai porn scripts ever was conceived on Twitter.

The casting went something like this…

Dhalsim as Dirk Diggler

T-Hawk is out there going down face-first 

M. Bison was outted as a human dildo..

Guile and Chun Li are an item

As are Ken & Ryu…

 

Even poor Akuma was thrown under the tournament bus. Elon did try to restore some order…

But it was too late. E. Honda was outted..

As were  Zangief and Fei Long 

And evidently the Vega put the “Bi” in Bison…

There will even be Fisting…and not in the way you think

Even some Mortal Kombat characters got drafted…

Luckily, CNN’s Don Lemon tweeted his haircut and derailed the conversation before the “Tekken” and “Samurai Shodown” crews were put on the stroll. All we have to say is that we are seriously considering going as M. Bison for Halloween this year.

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