Three albums have passed, but when it comes to Drake, some things painfully refuse to change. “Nothing Was The Same” leaked early to a good chunk of anticipation… but the trademark Drake is back in the booth bringing the emo staples that make women swoon while the fellas wince. Yep, more rhymes about more feelings about more women, and apparently, every single one of them is the ONE that got away. Here’s a quick rundown of who’s always on the roster no matter which game Drake is running.
7) Nine-to-Fiver: Whether it’s a waitress, a bartender, valet or a random chick from the hot dog stand, you can count on your dude Drizzy to throw a glass slipper on anyone it’ll fit.
“Isn’t it ironic that the girl I wanna marry is a wedding planner/that tells me my life is too much and then moves to Atlanta…”
6) Stripper: We’ve been seeing this chick since the Houston/Atlanta/Vegas days. She’s the one that Drake apparently follows from club to club with his cape flapping in the wind. Even though she’s using him, he still wants to tell Maliah, he’s on fire, she should work tonight. Simpin aint easy…
“Talking strippers and models that try to gain attention/Even a couple pornstars that I’m ashamed to mention.”
5) College Girl: I don’t know how long Aubrey spent in college, but even though he told us “I’m just not the social type and campus life is crazy” it seems like he’s kept in contact enough to know who got their degrees and moved on without him… which it looks like is ALL of them.
“Intelligent too ooh you’re my sweetheart/I’ve always liked my women book and street smart. Long as they got a little class like half days/and the confidence to overlook my past ways…”
4) Ex-Girl: There have to be a million of these. They’re the ones he watches from a distance, waits till he knows they’re happy without him, gets drunk and introduces them to the view in Marvin’s Room. I guess it’s got windows to let the smell of desperate out.
“F*ck that n*gga that you think you love so bad/I know you still think about the times we had…”
3) Industry Chick: Whether she’s a tongue-twisting rap vixen or a chart topping R&B diva, Mr. Graham has no problem risking 1) his pride on social media with fake proposals, or 2) his health in nightclubs during bottle-flinging fights.
” I love Nicki Minaj, I told her I’d admit it. I hope one day we get married just to say we fuckin’ did it. And girl I’m fuckin’ serious I’m with it if you with it…”
2) Childhood Friend: You can be his old babysitter, his mom’s MILF friends or some round the way play-date he was too afraid to speak to at the time. Have no fear, Drake is still thinking about you.
“Do I ever come up in discussions/over double pump lattes and low-fat muffins.”
1) Your Girl: Part of the reason Drake may be having trouble holding on to those good girls is that he’s too busy sliding up in yours…
“Come get your girl, she been here for three days and she way too attached to me…”
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