Does “Miss Independent” Wear The Pants?

I was cruising in my SUV down White Plains Rd. in The Bronx the other day when I started boppin’ my head and mouthing the lyrics to Ne-Yo’s “Miss Independent”: “She’s got her own thing, that’s why I love herrrrrr”…then it hit me.

The lyrics of the song suddenly became disturbing. If men dig independent women, why are so many of us SINGLE? Why are all the “needy” women – who need a man for everything from cheap sex to a McDonald’s extra value meal – getting all the love? Call me old fashioned, but shouldn’t a man love a woman for who she is and not what she has? And I’m not referring to how “phat” a woman’s booty looks in her Apple Bottom jeans, or any physical attribute for that matter. I’m talkin’ good ol’ heart and soul.

I started thinking a little bit deeper into my own situation, being single and all. I consider myself fabulous, but do men truly value independence? I wonder if having my own crib, car, career, and income is the reason why the men who were once lined up at my parents door (back when I was broke and far from independent), wearing their hearts on their sleeves, were now “ghost.” Is Ne-Yo just calling out independent women in his lyrics because he thinks they can “afford” to download his album on iTunes? And are successful women intimidating to men?

Perhaps I’m thinking in overdrive and the new generations to come just don’t have the same values anymore. Tell me if I’m wrong, but it seems as though us women are beginning to accept that men are not willing to step up to the plate and play Mr. Security and Mr. Provider. What ever happened to men and women coupling-up and then devising a plan to achieve and grow to success, together?  Is that concept lost? I’d love to hear your thoughts on this…let me know what’s the real deal. Perhaps I should tell the next guy I meet that I am broke, unemployed, and in debt – with an eviction notice on my door – just to see what happens, who knows…