When I Studied Abroad, Capetown

To get an outside opinion we enlisted Amanda (Diva) Seales, who attended SUNY Purchase and Angela Yee, who attended Wesleyan University, to candidly share when the sex is best and why. Be warned, you must be over 18 to view this video, grown folk time.

For all of our readers, your input is needed! What do our students have to say? And college alumni? When is sex best?

Is Sex Better In College or After?

Audra The Rapper: “I Thought My College Roommate Was A Prostitute”
Syleena Johnson On Campus Racism And Pledging A Sorority [EXCLUSIVE]

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Ray-J ” I Don’t Hang With Stars, I Create Them, Kim Was Created!”

9 Reasons People Still Have Sex With Kat Stacks

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Ray-J & Jeremih Fight At Birthday Party Over His Girlfriend

Ray-J “Celebration” (feat. Ludacris) [VIDEO]

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15 Scenes We Love From “Dont Be A Menace to South Central While Drinking Your Juice In The Hood”

The video for his new song “She’s Single” features the R&B crooner in a variety of uhhh.. compromising positions, if you will.

Though most of the action is draped in shadow, the video is still pretty NSFW (“not-safe-for-work” for the newbies out there), so watch when no one’s around your desk, or just wait until you get home.

The video comes hot on the heels of Keri Hilson’s controversial (Ed: and confusing) video for “The Way You Love Me,” but even that video doesn’t have us acting like Eddie Murphy, Halle Berry and Melvin Van Peebles in Boomerang.

EDDIE: “Is that a nipple”

HALLE: “That’s a shadow of a nipple.”

MELVIN: “Nah, that’s a nipple, cuz I’m droolin!”

Do you think this video and Keri Hilson’s new video are too racy?

RELATED: Keri Hilson Gets Raunchy In “The Way You Love Me” [VIDEO]

RELATED: Raheem DeVaughn: “There is Nothing Like Picking Your Kids Up From School”

Dear Ask The Black Man,

I was having a friendly debate with my wife on who does more work between the sheets. Of course I think that that man does most of the work but my wife begs to differ. I want to get your perspective on this. Who do you think puts in the most work?

-Alex

The Black Man:

Hi Alex,

There is not one answer to this because it all depends on what you are doing between the sheets. If a couple is prone to just doing the missionary position I would probably say the man is doing most of the work,even though a woman can be very active in that position. I have had conversations with many men who feel that they are doing most of the work in that position because a lot (not all) women tend to just lay there.

On the flip side (no pun intended) if the woman is on top most time in a cowgirl or reverse cowgirl position she is more prone to be doing most of the work, even though a man can be very active from the bottom as well.

Of course there are many other positions and fetishes that can be done in bed, it just depends on what you are doing in bed and what you are into to determine the balance of the workload.

Lastly, the work can extend outside of the bed in creating an ambiance for if you are into any role-play activities; if so you may want to keep that in mind as well when you are having this debate. Some situations can take a lot of thought, time, and effort.

At the end of day you both should be concerned on pleasing each other rather than being concerned with who is doing most of the work.

Thanks my 99 Cents Worth,

TBM

Classic scene from “Boomerang” Who does all the work?

RELATED POSTS:

We thought of 9 reasons why Kat Stacks would be doable…

Click here, for Soulja Boy Recap.

9. She’s Been Neutured

This was the recovery period after she was neutered.

Celebs can have sex with her all they want without worrying about having off-spring.

8. She Can Run In Heels

Men love a women with a “Mean shoe game, who’s up on S.Dot and Vera Wang” but she has to have a mean walk to go along with it– Kat Stacks can RUN in heels so she has a head up on the competition(get it– Head up [laughs])

7. She’s Gangsta

She has a criminal record.

And comes at rappers more than 50 Cent.

“This ain’t Chuckee Cheese m*therf*cker”

“I been in the streets since I was 15″

“Real Recognize Real”

You’ll feel safe in her arms.

6. She Can Take Shots With The Best Of Em’

What man doesn’t want to sit down and have a drink with their lady, even if she grabs the the bottle and guzzles it. Kat Stacks guzzles like a pro!

5. Her Bangs

We believe she has a second mouth under her bangs.

4. Her Body

Besides the terribly fake implants, Kat kind of, almost, maybe, a little bit has a “nice body”

3. She Can Put A Spark In Any Music Career

Just ask Chopper:

2. She Can Take A Hit

Slap her, punch her, beat her down and she will get back up!

1. She Has That Bomb A** P***y

This may be a long shot but we’re thinking that after all the sh*t we talk about Kat Stacks that maybe she just has that good ol’ snap back!

All this or she turns into Superhead at Midnight. Could it be that they’re the same people and Supherhead has found another way to infiltrate the rap world{GASP}?

Superhead Changed The World And Kat Stacks Hates

Dear Black Man,

I met someone on the Black Planet website. We went out for dinner and immediately hit it off. I kissed on the first date … ugggggh… I couldn’t resist because there were so many sparks. The conversation was great. Dinner was excellent. It was an amazing time. After the date he never called. I finally got a hold of him about 5 days later and asked him to go to dinner. Instead I went to his place and he cooked for me. Guess what happened? Yes … we “did it.” It was kind of planned on both of our parts. I guess we both really wanted it and I know better. Now I am afraid he will never call me again and I really like him a lot.

Not that it matters but he’s black and I am white and we’re both professionals and 40 years of age. He drives me crazy. What should I do?

S&M

The Black Man:

Hi S&M,

It does seem like it was a little bit too soon for you to sleep with him since you really like him and there was no mutual clarity in your situation. I know it can be hard to control your emotions especially when you have strong feelings for someone and the sexual energy is in the air. My question to you is did he have a good reason for not calling you after your first date? You don’t want to be hung out there like a cat on a string chasing this guy and set up for disappointment and possibly just be used for sex. In this case I would wait to see if he reaches out to you. If he reaches out and you hang out again I would take it slow. If he does not I would cut your loss early, get over it and move on.

You can always look at it from the bright side; if he does not call you at least you know from the beginning what he was about rather than investing a lot of time in the situation.

Good Luck and I hope this helps.

TBM

RELATED

Dear Ask The Black Man,

I have been dating this guy for a while and we get along really well. We recently just started having sex. I really enjoy it but I am not sure I am pleasing him. A few times he has been in bed after he “climaxed” and he is still fully erect and then got up and said he had to go to the bathroom and was in there for a while. My gut feeling is that he was in there “finishing off the job.” I never thought about it before but is it possible for men to fake orgasms?

-Suzanne

The Black Man:

Hi Suzanne,

Yes, it is possible for men to fake orgasms. I am not sure in this case if he is doing that or not but it is possible. Just how some men may not please a woman in bed, the same goes for women not pleasing men in the bedroom at times.
The best thing you can do is just ask him if he had an orgasm or not. If he did not reach an orgasm then ask him what he likes and does not like in bed. It’s not the end of the world. You guys just started having sex so it may take time for you to click together.

Communication is the best solution.

I hope this advice helps.

TBM

RELATED POSTS:

Uncle Luke recently wrote a very interesting article about how the market for prostitutes in Miami has gone down, primarily due to the fact that supply has strongly exceeded demand. He also seems to argue that the labor rights of hooker/strippers are consistently violated by club owners who demand a piece of the action.

According to Luke:

The price of sex has gone down to $50 at local strip clubs. In fact, so many girls are screwing customers that the holdouts are losing money. So says an exotic dancer I met recently. She complained that she is going to get kicked out of her apartment because she won’t put out.

Luke goes on to describe more of the experience of the modern-day stripper who earns her money by “moonlighting.” He writes about a woman he calls “ATL,” a stripper who is tempted to put in extra work to make ends meet:

There was a day when ATL would get on the top stage at any one of those ti**y bars and make $300 or $400 dancing to one song. Now she’s lucky to collect $10.  More and more, girls are dancing less and just having sex.

Will demand go up once LeBron and Bosh come to town? Does T-Pain need to be brought in to lobby for strippers rights?

READ MORE AT BLACKVOICES

RELATED:Luke Campbell Puts Foot In Mouth Over “Sperm Donor” Comments

RELATED: Sex Tips From Gloria Velez

Dear Ask The Black Man,

Why do men say they want a strong woman but when they get one don’t want her? I find that absolutely baffling.

-Nique

The Black Man:

Hi Nique,

It goes back to the old saying, “Be careful for what you ask for because you just may get it”

Some people want things and either these three things happen:
1) They are happy with what they received.
2) They realized what they actually asked for is not what they want upon delivery.
3) They are not ready for what they asked for.

The same happens for when women ask for their ideal man. He can be standing right in front of them and they freak out because it is too good to be true and they reject him.

That is my 99 Cents Worth.

He goes from talking about women being pure and being a virgin to talking bout a female staying still while they have sex. Fidgeting really bothers him!

According to Kat Stacks Bow Wow couldn’t stay h*ard for too long, maybe she was moving around too much!

Really Bow Wow, I think your a virgin!

Kat Stacks Is Knocked Up And Say Jay Rock Or Chopper Is The Dad

TWITTER BEEF: Bow Wow Vs Chris Brown

Dear Blackman,

I am 41 years old and my boyfriend of five years is 54. He suffers from erectile dysfunction due to his type two diabetes. He doesn’t even try to have sex with me anymore and I want to have sex. My sex drive is extremely high and I don’t want to cheat on him. I am so tired of using my vibrator and having oral sex. What should I do?

-Backed Up

The Black Man:

Hi Backed Up,

It is a tough situation that you are in and it is very commendable of you to persevere considering the circumstance at hand. I would suggest that the two of you go to a physician and discuss this issue. There may be a solution. There are so many products on the market now that help with fixing the issue of erectile dysfunction. However, you need to check with a physician to make sure that there would be no side effects, especially with him having type two diabetes. You may also want to go to a holistic doctor to get an opinion as well.

Make sure to be completely open and honest about your feelings in regards to this because you don’t want to grow resentful towards him by trying to hide your emotions.

Open communication is the best way to approach and get through this situation.

I wish you the best of luck.

TBM

We don’t have the naked photos but you can head on over to The YBF if you’re dying to see

Ne-Yo & Entourage Detained After Fight In Norway

In this rare case of chin vs. forehead, these two ladies share one common denominator: Chris Brown. Not only did Natalie claim she and Chris Brown are friends but she didn’t deny that they were intimately involved. Watch the clip:

“Who cares shes’s (Rihanna) a punk b*tch!” -Natalie Nunn

So here we go, who’s the hotter Bad Girl?

Bad Girls Club 4 Reunion-”I Look Like A Man, And I Punch Like Man”

Video: Rihanna Talks Drugs, B-Breezy And Jay-Z

Another celeb is victim to the whole “my ex-girlfriend leaked these nude photos” scandal that has taken the internet by storm. This time it’s Bobby V.

You can check out the photos on TheYBF.com. Scandalous? or is Bobby just jumping on the bandwagon?

5 Reasons Women Don’t Get Caught Cheating

Hoopz On Sex Tape: “I Thought It Was Erased!”

Am I being selfish for wanting to have an open relationship with my husband of 15 years?

-Double A

The Blackman:

Hi Double A,

I don’t think that you are being selfish. It appears that you want to get some “fresh air” for better use of terms. Have you discussed this with your husband yet? If not, I would really look into why you really feel this way and make sure this is something that you really want to do. I say this because if you discuss this with your husband and whether he agrees or disagrees it could possibly be detrimental to your marriage. If he gets angry  it could cause a strain. Also, it is important to make sure you will be able accept the fact of him being with other women if he chooses to do so. In some instances, the person in the relationship that lobbies for an open relationship winds up getting hurt by it because they get jealous of their mate being with someone else.

Take some time to really consider this before moving forward with it.

That’s my 99 Cents Worth.

Good Luck.

TBM

Dear TBM,

I am a newly wed (I have been married about two months) and from the outside it seems like I have it all. I am 22 years old. I just graduated college and getting ready to enter law school. I am beautiful,successful, and just bought a new house. You name it, and I’ve got it; But yet still I am unhappy. I have been to therapy, counseling, etc… I’ve read self help books, and I meditate. There is still a void which leads to my problem. To fill this void, I tend to seek male attention, and then have affairs. I love my husband, but I can not seem to stop sleeping with other men. I know it’s wrong. I know better but I do it anyway. Can you give me some advice on this?

-Candy

The Blackman:

Hi Candy,

I find this interesting scenario because you always hear about the husband cheating on the wife and now you are hearing about the wife cheating on the husband. I am not trying to point you out but wives cheating on husbands is just as commonplace in marriage and it is not because their husband cheated on them.

My first thought is to know what your relationship is like with your father. Sometimes when a relationship between a father and daughter is not good and the daughter may feel not accepted by her father, they tend to try to fill that void with other men. So getting attention from men and satisfying them is a common way to try and fill that void. It is only temporary so that is why a woman will go from one man to the next.

Another possibility is timing. You are 22 years old. You are young and perhaps you are just not ready to settle down. You may truly love your husband but you may not be ready for marriage. Women can want to sow their wild oats as well. You just not might not be ready for a commitment.

You should really look into the situation with your husband and ask yourself these questions.. Does he give you enough attention? Does he please you sexually? Does he really make you happy? If all of these answers are yes, then I would say then you may not be ready to be in a committed situation. If the answers are no, then that is the reason why you are trying to fill the void because there are elements missing in your relationship. You would need to figure out if you both could really move forward together and you should be upfront with him about your feelings.

The last thing possibility could be that if this is just a sexual thing. If you are fully content with your husband but you just like to have sex with other people at times then you may want to look at the option of an open marriage. Some couples have a great relationship/marriage but they just like to be physical with other individuals at times. Nothing more than that. Both parties really have to be on the same page for that.

Definitely figure out what it is and be honest with yourself about it. If this happening two months into a marriage this is only going to get worse, cause drama, and people will get their feelings hurt in which one of those people could be you.

Good luck with your situation.

TBM

Dear TBM,

I just turned 32 years old and I am dating a man that is 47 years old.  We have a wonderful, passion-filled, intimate relationship.  The only issue in our relationship is that he suffers from Low Testosterone (LowT), which causes a form of Erectile Dysfunction(ED.) He has a hard time getting and maintaining an erection suitable for intercourse. I love this man with all my heart and the only problem is I cannot experience the “BIG O”. I am a very sexual person. I do not want to loose this man because of this. Please give me some advice on how to handle this.
-DS

The Black Man:

Hi DS,

It has to be tough for you to go through this especially with someone you love very dearly. I would suggest for him to go to a physician and also sex therapist/counselor. There may be things in his diet that can help him through this.

He may not be eating properly. He should make sure to eat a lot of live green foods. Also he should exercise on a regular basis. That helps produce hormones in your body.

Also something like this can be very mental so going to see a sex therapist can be helpful to break this down and really get to the crux of the matter. His confidence level between the sheets most likely is sub par right now and that needs to be raised (no pun intended).

If none of that is effective then he should check with his physician to see if he is able to take a product like Viagra or Cialis. I would make this last resort is all else fails.

You can also look into some natural herbal supplements that may help as well.

Good Luck.

TBM

Dear Blackman,

I started dating someone that I have known since college. I am attracted to the person and would like to pursue a relationship him. A few years back I slept with one of his best friends. I am not sure if he knows or not. Should I tell him?

-Sarah

The Blackman:

Hi Sarah,

If you are looking to pursue a relationship with this guy then you should tell him. That can be something very crucial in his decision to be in a relationship with you.

Some men are very particular about dealing with a female that has slept with any of his friends, especially if it is really close friend.

If you don’t tell him now it could easily come up later on, and he could have severe trust issues with you assuming that you’re being shady and hiding other stuff.

Another thing to also consider is that he may already know since it is a close friend of his. He may be sitting back waiting to see if you are going to come out and say anything about it. The way you handle that could dictate how he may want to move forward in dating you.

I would be upfront about it. No matter what the result is, it will save a lot of drama.

I hope this helps. Good Luck.

TBM

Dear Blackman,

I am a married woman and I love my husband very much. He is a great man. He treats me like queen and he takes care of the family. The one element that has been missing as of late is the spark in our sex life. We don’t do it as much as we use to and when we do it’s pretty routine. It’s nothing special like it used to be. Can you suggest anything to change this?

-Steph Lover

The Blackman:

Hi Steph Lover,

This is common in some marriages. Between work and taking of the family. Your sex life can be reduce due to more responsibilities and/ or choosing to sleep instead of having sex. Having a family may slow down the spontaneous sex life.

A suggestion is to move it out of your own bedroom. Plan a weekend getaway or even a overnight stay somewhere. It can be good to get outside of your element which can help rekindle the spark. Let the grandparents or someone else take care of the family. Bring the sexy outfits that he likes and tell him to bring what you find to be sexy.

As far as in your own bedroom, it may sound weird but if you are both busy plan in your schedules times where the focal point is you and him. Another thing could be to once and while call him a work and let him know that you can’t wait for him to get home and let him know somethings that you would like to him and to be done to you (smile).

Last but most importantly, bring this up to him so it is clear that this is a concern to you. It may be something that he did not realize has changed, and could easily make amendments to make it better.

I hope it works out.

TBM

By RK Byers

Recently, my good friend, writer Dimitry Leger and I were explaining via e-mail to another good friend, a popular female writer, what, to us, made the female writer sexy: she’s a “space cadet” we wrote. She’s one of those chicks who you could be looking right in the eye: knowing that in her mind, she’s a million miles away. While our female writer friend agreed with the assessment of her “cadet” status, she couldn’t understand at all why this made her sexy.

“It makes men wanna work harder to be the focus of your attention”, I wrote.

Enter Rihanna: a “singer” by trade, if you call that singing. Quite honestly, Rihanna’s voice sounds like the last moan of an animal that’s been run over by a truck. Her stage performances are atrocious. She just stands there as if she’s been named queen of some country whose language she doesn’t fully understand. And when the camera catches her in the eyes, there’s the telltale look of the “cadet”-a vacant, almost hollow expression that one could easily mistake for Paris Hilton-level empty-headedness if one didn’t look closer.

Make no mistake about it, though-Rihanna is a cutie. She’d warrant a second glance if she were just another girl at the end of the subway platform. Her sense of style is dazzling. She also has a knack for making smash hit records-a knack shared with a fellow “cadet” singer of limited voice but a much bigger catalogue; Madonna. It is yet to be determined if Rihanna will become as iconic and legendary as Madge, but like the older gal, Rihanna already has a track record for leaving men broken, dejected and wondering.

After a rumored affair with pre-marriage Jay-Z that supposedly had the old coot in such a frenzied state that he was reportedly crazy enough to consider leaving Beyonce, Rihanna turned Chris Brown into Ike Turner. She then left Drake mumbling “You the f___ing best!” on wax like a punch-drunk Tourette sufferer.

While the Lauryn Hills of the world turn us on because we know from the door that they’re deep, profound and intellectual, with “cadets” like Rihanna, it’s more of the possibility of depth that lures us in. A possibility that suggests that joys unimagined are there for the taking if only we as men would have the guts to reach for them.

But, of course, being men, there’s only one way we can think of reaching.

I’m not shocked that Amber and Russell are crossing paths (I mean come on, modelizer meets hot video girl…it’s so simple), I just SMH at all these statements that Amber wants to “give back” and that she met Cassidy at a softball game and doesn’t know him AT ALL.

Right, so incase you haven’t heard Kanye supposedly dumped Amber because she fooled around on him with Cassidy. Cassidy came out and admitted it but Amber is still denying it. Here’s what GlobalGrind.com reported that she said:

She has dreams and aspirations that she doesn’t want ruined by innuendo and games played by others. So, one thing she wants to make clear, that Russ believes is true, that she does not know Cassidy…especially since Cassidy has already come out publicly and admitted to not knowing her. Although she has no interest in addressing this directly, she does want the world to know the details about Cassidy…”she met him once at a softball game and that’s it.”

If Russ believes her, do you?

Read the rest here.

Click here to see Cassidy speak on his relationship with Amber Rose!

Who’s this new man with Amber Rose? Click here to see!

Diddy was caught partying it up recently with some scantily clad girls and one (who is not Cassie) who took her top off for the Bad Boy. Check out the pics below:

Click here to see Diddy whoop some @ss!

Diddy-Twitter backlash???? READ HERE!

Russell Simmons’ swirlin’ might be headed for disaster. The New York Post claims that Russ and Julie Henderson are having relationship problems due to the huge age difference between the pair.

“Her friends are having major problems with the fact that he’s so much older than she is,” says an insider.

Russell is now 51 and his girlfriend, Julie, is a 23-year-old model who was featured in Sports Illustrated last year. This makes for a 28 year age difference.

Read more here.

Check out our Russell Simmons Loves White Girls gallery here!

Click here for photos of Juli and Russell getting freaky on the beach!

Russell Simmons was spotted this weekend in Miami making out with a young caucasian girl. See more of the swirl action below:

Click here for our Russell Simmons Loves White Girls gallery!

Click here for more of the latest Celebrity Sightings!

Exotic model Lia Cha always gets asked where she’s from. It only makes sense- this beauty is hard to guess. Her father is from Ghana, West Africa and her mother is Korean.

We think she is the perfect example of the beauty of international relations…

Lia is represented by Morena Entertainment Models

Also check out last week’s Skin Deep Model Jenelle Simone

Dimesdaily.com presents the “69 Sexiest Rap Song Titles of all-time,” featuring romantic ballads including 2 Live Crew’s “Face Down, Ass Up”, Kilo Ali’s “Love in the Mouth” and charming titles such as CB4′s “Sweat of My Balls”…

In Alphabetical order by artist:

2Pac – How Do U Want It
2 Live Crew – Me So Horny
2 Live Crew – Just Wanna Touch Ya
2 Live Crew – Pigs Fuckin’
2 Live Crew – Face Down, Ass Up
504 Boys – I Can Tell You Wanna Fuck
10 K.A.N.’s – U Need Dick In Your Life
Akon – I Wanna Fuck You
Boogie Down Productions – Sex and Violence
Busta Rhymes ft. Kokane – Ass On Your Shoulders

See the full monty by clicking here!

Cheetah Girl Adrienne Bailon has just become a member of the Teenie Boppers for Naked Internet Pictures Organization.

Bailon, who was also a member of the R&B group 3LW, apparently took some photos (NSFW) of herself for her boyfriend/reality TV star Robert Kardashian from Keeping up with the Kardashians (read: Kim Kardashian’s little brother). According to reports, Adrienne claimed that her laptop was stolen a few weeks ago and now revealing photos of the teen star are floating around the internet. Bailon’s lawyers are seeing to it that an investigation on this matter begins immediately.

And the Disney scandals keep on coming… – LYNDSEY WOODS

Source: Egotastic