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Ten Gifts For Chris Brown That Only Cost $10

Written by Jerry L. Barrow, Senior Editor
Published on March 7, 2013

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According to our sisters at HelloBeautiful, Chris Brown is among several men who are desperately in need of a hug. After his latest blow-up at a bowling alley over a $10 valet fee, we think Chris could use some more good tidings. Maybe even a gift.

Chris Brown Threatens Bowling Alley Valet Over $10 [UPDATE]

So here are ten $10 gifts that we’d like to give Chris Brown to help improve his mood. [Hat tip to Uncrate.com for the ideas.]

1. Transformers 3D Helmet:

Why just rock those 3D glasses at the theater when you can have a whole an entire helmet? This could also help the “I’mma Transform You” singer get back in touch with his inner child and find some peace.

2. Beer & Pretzel Marshmallows
Maybe he just had the munchies and REALLY needed to get to his car. This would solve that problem.

3.Sugru
For those moments when you break a few windows or a few bottles, having this space age glue nearby would come in handy to fix a mess in a hurry.

4.The History Of The Fart
Who couldn’t get a giggle out of this book on the history of flatulence? And considering how much sh*t he finds himself in?

5.Serrated Ice Cream Scoop
When you are hard but soft character this is the best gift ever. No more hulking out when that Gelato will not surrender quietly making that vein in the side of your head pop out. This Predator approved scooper will cut through the most gangsta of dairy confections.

6.The U.S. Navy Seal Survival Handbook
The next time a valet gets in your face or a DJ plays your arch enemies song in the club you can make them disappear off the face of the planet without leaving any evidence behind for TMZ.

7.50 Caliber Bullet Bottle Opener
His music is already #1 with a bullet and maybe he’ll let out some of that latent aggression in a more productive way.

8. Adobe Photo Shop Touch
Before you pick out another ill-advised tattoo sketch your thoughts out on this Photoshop app for on your iPad.

9. Breathable Chocolate
What covers the scent of stripper booty on your breath better than chocolate air? And no calories!

10. Coin Guitar Pic

Everyone has offered their two cents on what Chris Brown should do about his anger. Now when he pretends to play the guitar again he can repay the favor.

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