As a writer, you’re always listening to music while you work, or at least I do. And with most people, I don’t catch every single word said in the first few listens. Sometimes, it will take me forever to figure out one word or what an artist meant when they said something in a song. then there are other times when you listen to a song that you’ve heard a million times and hear something brand new.
Someone in the office had their cheesy ’90s playlist on full blast and the song that caught my attention was Snap’s “Rhythm Is A Dancer.” As corny as the song is considered to be now, back then, it was the business. And don’t try to act like you didn’t bust a move to it at least once. Anyway, one of the lines is “I’m serious as cancer when I say rhythm is a dancer.” My reaction to that was, “That just ruined my listening experience. Why the hell do I want to think about cancer when I’m on my cheesy ’90s music swag?!” The subsequent conversation with my co-workers prompted me to look at other songs that were great but had one terrible line to mess it up. Peep some of the greatest songs with terrible lyrics below. Add your own in the comments.
Sade – “Smooth Operator” (1985)
Terrible Lyric: “Coast to coast / L.A. to Chicago”
Who forgot to give Sade an American geography lesson? Sade is lucky this song is so dope that we’ll forgive her.
Justin Timberlake ft. T.I – “My Love” (2006)
Terrible Lyric: “They call me candle guy, simply because I am on fire”
Candle guy? Really, Tip? Candle guy? They couldn’t think of anything better than candle guy? I know the name Human Torch was taken, but c’mon son.
Game – Dreams (2004)
Terrible Lyric: “I woke up out that coma 2001/’bout the same time Dre dropped “2001”
Maybe when Game came out of that coma, he was transported back in time because we all know Dre’s “2001” drop in 1999. Why do you think Snoop Dogg said, “Back up in this. Nine five plus fo’ pennies.” Duh!
Kanye West – “I Don’t Like (Remix)” (2012)
Terrible Lyric: “I was in too deep like Mehki Pfife”
This would have been good had Kanye West not mistaken Omar Epps for Mehki Phifer.
I don’t know which is worse; a reference to a brutal murder of a teenager in a song about sex or his date rape line in the remix of “U.E.N.O.” Either way, Ricky’s got some ‘splaining to do.
Canibus – “Second Round K.O.” (1998)
Terrible Lyric: “You ain’t got the skills to eat a n***a’s ass like me”
Canibus had the world thinking he was about to end LL Cool J’s career with “Second Round K.O.” That is until Canibus started talking about having skills to eat males’ booty. Yeah, pause on all fronts!
DMX – “Here Comes The Boom” (1998)
Terrible Lyric: “Chump n*gga, I stomp a mud hole in your face /Muthaf**ka, rip your butthole outta place”
DMX, you are doing too much. Why are you trying to rip a dude’s butthole out of place? That’s just sick!
Janet Jackson – “Feedback” (2008)
Terrible Lyric: “‘Cause my swag is serious Something heavy like a first day period”
Girl, if your swag is heavy like a first day period, I’m going to avoid your swag like Sallie Mae bill collectors.
Kanye West – “New God Flow” (2012)
Terrible Lyric: “Cuz we can’t get along/No resolution til we drown all these haters/ Rest in peace to Whitney Houston”
It was too damn soon, Kanye!
Timbaland & Magoo – “Up Jumps Da Boogie” (1997)
Terrible Lyric: “Up in the cut, like gay niggaz, in butt”
No wonder why Magoo is longer apart of Timbaland’s Thomas Crown affair.
Notorious B.I.G. – “Me & My B*tch” (1994)
Terrible Lyric: “You look so good huh, I suck on your daddy’s dick”
There is no girl that fine. Even if she looked better than Halle Berry, Jasnet Jackson, Beyonce, Jill Scott, and all of the sexiest black Sports Illustrated swimsuit models; it aint happening.
