Every year, people all over the United States gather to celebrate the survival of the Pilgrims through that first brutal winter after they landed in the Virginia colony. This celebration usually involves a large feast in which family and friends gather together to give thanks to God.
This year, we at The Urban Daily have put together the guest list for our ideal celebrity Thanksgiving day feast.
50 Cent: For all of his macho posturing and, let’s face it, childish antics, Curtis still seems like a pretty fun guy to be around. He’s constantly shown that he’s got a sense of humor, and seems rather smart. However, his penchant for getting into tiffs with other MCs means we have to be careful who else we invite. For this reason, we’re asking Curtis to bring a nice beef dish.
Chris Brown: It’s been a pretty rough year for Chris Breezy. He beat up his girlfriend, lost some endorsement deals, got booted from Timbaland’s new album, and he’s got a rather unfortunate album cover. He’s been rather repentant for his actions and seems to have humbled himself a bit. We’re requesting that Chris bring some humble pie to dinner.
Lil’ Wayne: 2009 was probably Weezy’s best year to date. He seemed rather unstoppable. As this will be one of Weezy’s last big meals before he heads to jail next year, we want Wayne to be comfortable. Wayne will be handling all beverages. Just go easy on the drinks that are in the styrofoam cups.
Kanye West: Kanye’s ego finally caused a bit of a backlash for him this year after he stormed the stage and interrupted Taylor Swift’s acceptance speech at this year’s MTV Video Music Awards. Because ‘Ye is so full of himself, we’ve asked him to bring stuffing for Nicki Minaj’s turkey.
Nicki Minaj: Why is Nicki bringing the turkey? Because she’s a bird. Next!
Alicia Keys: Ms. Keys has been the subject of a lot of scorn in the blogosphere for her alleged homewrecking relationship with Swizz Beatz. We’ve asked Swizz’s side piece to bring the side dish of her choice.
Keri Hilson: Keri’s inexplicably been on the come-up this year. She’s had several high profile collaborations despite the fact that the majority of her songs are rather uninteresting. This leads us to ask her to bring a mixed greens salad, something bland and lacking in nutritional value.
Stephon Marbury: Starbury had a bit of an interesting summer. It seemed like he had a complete and total meltdown during a Ustream broadcast where we witnessed him crying, singing Kirk Franklin songs, and eating petroleum jelly. We are simply asking Stephon to bring some cranberry sauce. It tastes better on stuffing than Vaseline.
Ray-J: Somehow, Ray-J’s VH1 reality show, For The Love of Ray-J, got renewed for a second season. Ray-J’s celebrity always puzzled me. Despite the fact that he’s Brandy’s brother, there hasn’t been much of a reason for him to be a celebrity. We’ve requested that he bring a giant ham to dinner.
T.I.: We sent out an invitation to T.I. and asked him to bring biscuits, but his publicist reminded us that he was in jail for being in possession of biscuits of another sort…
Black Eyed Peas: It would’ve been too easy for us to ask Will.I.Am, Fergie and those other two guys to bring some black eyed peas. Instead, we’re requesting that this stinky band prepare a stinky batch of chitlins for our thanksgiving meal.